O, Me of Little Faith

And the Lord said, “If you had faith like a mustard seed, you would say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be uprooted and be planted in the sea’; and it would obey you. – Luke 17:6

photo credit: Dane Vandeputte via photopin cc

photo credit: Dane Vandeputte via photopin cc

Sometimes my faith seems so small. As small as the mustard seed Jesus talked about… do you think He did that on purpose, knowing it would be all I could manage here in the future and in the pain?

Trust and obey… for there’s no other way…

Yes, but Jesus, I want to understand! I want to be able to prove that there is a purpose. I want to know the purpose, define it and polish it and hold onto it like a gemstone of great price.

When you have no answers and the hurt is so real, then the answers seem even more valuable. More than valuable, they seem vital. Like I simply will not be able to carry on if I don’t know something, even the smallest of epiphanies.

I am like a beggar sitting beneath the table, desperate for a scrap of wisdom that would choke me with its greatness if it were to fall at my feet. And still I sit and still I beg, my pleading eyes filling with tears as I try to make sense of non-sensical things that were never meant to be a part of this life in the first place.

The only thing that I have come to understand is that I am not meant for this world. I know without a doubt that my God is a good and loving and merciful God who wants to give me only good, who wants to bring me to Himself.

Closer…

Closer…

Closer…

He whispers sweet nothings, knowing that answers are not what I truly need. When I ask for bread, He will not give me a stone. I ask for bread and He grants me a feast.

“But bread, I want bread,” I insist.

“No, Beloved,” He answers. “You must have manna, and dates dripping with honey. You will only grow with milk and wine and unleavened bread. Forget the bread, and feast, Child, feast.”

Trust and obey… for there’s no other way…

Or what man is there among you who, when his son asks for a loaf, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, he will not give him a snake, will he? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him! – Matthew 7:9-11

Dear God, I believe, help my unbelief! Take this mustard seed of faith, Lord, and grow me into a tree worthy of nesting in. In Jesus’ Name, Amen…


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May God Bless You,

Shelly

12 Comments on “O, Me of Little Faith

  1. Oh how I join you in your prayer, Shelly. Thank you for encouraging my heart today 🙂
    Love and blessings

    • I’m so glad I could encourage you, as you always encourage me, sweet Anita! Love you! Heart Hugs <3

  2. listening to your sad heart today, I stopped to listen to the Father and heard Him say:
    “He has an eternity of love He is just waiting to give you. The more you soak it in, the more of His love you can take in. He wants to saturate you in His love.”

    Rather than trying to work anything out,
    He just wants you to BE
    And soak whenever you can.

    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    • Thank you for this beautiful word, Mary. I love you. Heart Hugs <3

  3. This brings tears to my eyes: ““No, Beloved,” He answers. “You must have manna, and dates dripping with honey. You will only grow with milk and wine and unleavened bread. Forget the bread, and feast, Child, feast.”

    I so often forget the feast and I toil for crumbs. Thank you for this gift today.
    Jen+Ferguson recently posted…Connections: God Redeems All ThingsMy Profile

    • You, too, Jen? It’s so wonderful to know I am not alone in this. I’m praying for your REST. Love you. Heart Hugs, Shelly <3

  4. Isn’t that so true? We think we know what we need and we get frustrated if we don’t get it. But all along God has something better if we just trust in His timing. Thanks for sharing!

    • So very true, Erin. I thank God He doesn’t follow my lead. 😉 Heart Hugs, Shelly <3

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