The One for Brian

In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. - Ephesians 5:28

If I had known, on that long ago day when you knelt before me, ring in hand
that this was the future I was tying you to...
I don't believe I could have walked down that aisle and placed my hand in yours.

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I wanted so much more for you.

To know that you would learn to cook in your 30s, how to load a dishwasher and how big a load of laundry could be and still get clean...

To think that you would scoff at the mere suggestion that you would want to be anywhere else,
that you would become angry at the recommendation of placing me somewhere besides the home we share...
that in fact you would dream a new dream home with me in mind and an eye for a failing health future...

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To see for myself the look in your eyes when you reach over and take hold of my hand
as if it is the greatest intimacy when it is all I have to offer...
the feather touch of your lips on mine, the evenings you lovingly brush my hair,
remarking on the beauty in the strands that have gone gray from stress rather than old age.

This body is so tired, and has so little to offer, and yet you love each inch as wondrously as you always have,
as if I'm still a strong and healthy girl with swaying hips and flirty hair tosses.

When I'm certain that there is no smile left in me, beaten down as I am by the weight of all the loss this disease demands,
you come and sit beside me and before I know it, I am laughing and all is right with the world again.

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When I haven't the strength to even blink and the slightest touch on my skin is painful,
you find the softest fabrics and use the coolest touch
you make it okay.

You remind me that there is love, there is goodness, there is hope.

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Our marriage, it is what keeps me grounded in my faith when I may otherwise have forgotten...
that love given doesn't have to be earned
that love returned isn't about the body
that love is forever.

And so I guess I would take that walk after all...
down that aisle, in that veil, counting my steps so I didn't run to you the way my heart demanded...
because how could I not.

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You are my greatest blessing. You were then and you always have been.
I love you. I really do.
Dear God, thank You for the day You sent Brian into my life, and for every day since. In Jesus' Name, Amen...


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May God Bless You,

Shelly

10 Comments on “The One for Brian

  1. This is AMAZING and now hand me a tissue or two or maybe the entire box!!!♡♡♡
    You put my exact feelings on paper!
    Love it and LOVE you

    • Yes!!! I was thinking this post was just like my marriage, with my husband, Randy.

      Blessings on our husbands who love as the Lord loves.

  2. Shelly your beautiful words bring me to tears. Yes you are blessed to have had God given you Brain but Brian is so blessed to have you. God knew what he was doing when he put your souls together. You are so amazing to write and share your heart.

  3. Shelly - loved reading your words of love for your wonderful Brian.

    It is a true love story, no Hollywood endings but God's best given to you both in each other in spite of the enormous challenges you daily face.
    Who needs or would want Hollywood endings when you both have the best that God could give in giving you each other and keeping you close to Him.
    Lynn+Severance recently posted...The Courage to Trust in God's DelaysMy Profile

  4. Shelly,

    What a beautiful tribute to Christ in your marriage and to your beloved Brian. His faithfulness is a real life picture of Christ's love for the church. Thank you for sharing this and your pictures.

    I will keep praying for everyone's health ...so sorry to hear you're all sick now...((hugs))
    Dolly@Soulstops recently posted...A prayer of hope - 7My Profile

  5. What an incredibly touching post. Thank you for sharing your deepest heart and the amazing testimony of your husband's care for you, like Christ caring for His Bride, the Church.

    How blessed you are!

    You are also a wonderful testimony of acceptance and humility.

    I have been incredibly blessed to visit here today.

  6. What a love story you have shared with us. Words of love to a God given husband. And I know from hearing of the Godly man he is, words to bless Brian's heart that you know how deeply he treasures you.

  7. I am so thankful to our Lord, for the blessing and joy, and most of all, love, of your beloved, Brian. ((Hugs))

  8. Love, true love. Thank you for sharing these precious words and photos. Your honesty, courage, and love are so precious. Keeping you all in our hearts and prayers. <3

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