In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. - Ephesians 5:28
If I had known, on that long ago day when you knelt before me, ring in hand
that this was the future I was tying you to...
I don't believe I could have walked down that aisle and placed my hand in yours.
I wanted so much more for you.
To know that you would learn to cook in your 30s, how to load a dishwasher and how big a load of laundry could be and still get clean...
To think that you would scoff at the mere suggestion that you would want to be anywhere else,
that you would become angry at the recommendation of placing me somewhere besides the home we share...
that in fact you would dream a new dream home with me in mind and an eye for a failing health future...
To see for myself the look in your eyes when you reach over and take hold of my hand
as if it is the greatest intimacy when it is all I have to offer...
the feather touch of your lips on mine, the evenings you lovingly brush my hair,
remarking on the beauty in the strands that have gone gray from stress rather than old age.
This body is so tired, and has so little to offer, and yet you love each inch as wondrously as you always have,
as if I'm still a strong and healthy girl with swaying hips and flirty hair tosses.
When I'm certain that there is no smile left in me, beaten down as I am by the weight of all the loss this disease demands,
you come and sit beside me and before I know it, I am laughing and all is right with the world again.
When I haven't the strength to even blink and the slightest touch on my skin is painful,
you find the softest fabrics and use the coolest touch
you make it okay.
You remind me that there is love, there is goodness, there is hope.
Our marriage, it is what keeps me grounded in my faith when I may otherwise have forgotten...
that love given doesn't have to be earned
that love returned isn't about the body
that love is forever.
And so I guess I would take that walk after all...
down that aisle, in that veil, counting my steps so I didn't run to you the way my heart demanded...
because how could I not.
You are my greatest blessing. You were then and you always have been.
I love you. I really do.
Dear God, thank You for the day You sent Brian into my life, and for every day since. In Jesus' Name, Amen...
If you have been helped by this post and think it could be helpful to someone you know, please share this post on the social network of your choice for me.
All you have to do is click one of the buttons below.
May God Bless You,